I'm excited!!!

I'm excited!! Jason and I were inspired by Pastor Jason's challenge on Sunday. I woke up Monday morning to a note left on the table by my husband (who had gone to bed an hour earlier!). In the note he shared about how God has been working in his heart and how he feels God prompting us to be more frugal than we have been with our finances. SO...we've talked and decided we can easily do the following: cut internet (don't really need it), cut cell phones (it'd be MUCH cheaper to use a land line), search for cheaper car insurance plans, and get rid of our fitness membership (using Northwestern's equipment instead). The only thing we wouldn't get rid of is cable, so we can keep up on the news. Plus we only pay $15 monthly for cable.

But we're excited! Call us silly but the thought of living a more frugal life is exciting. It's our prayer that through this we care less and less for the things of this world, and experience a deeper love for the things loved by our God . It's also our prayer that we're committed to tithing and to paying off debt owed in student loans. The idea of having no debt is so freeing. And we know that it's in God's will that we pay back our debt as soon as we can.

I personally have decided to shop for clothes at second-hand stores. I rarely shop anyways but sometimes you can find some good stuff for really cheap!

So this is our new embarkment! Please pray that God strengthens our love and devotion to His cause through this commitment!

The Love of God

I was thinking the other day, as I was driving to work, about relationships. I was praying and was in frustration at the thought of my discontent -Discontent with one relationship in particular. I've been wondering why I don't have a deeper relationship with this person and have been hurt over it. But I realized- as I was praying, God showed me- that I desire more of a realtionship with this person than this person desires from me. I thought of different instances that have made this relatively clear.... and initially this thought really hurt me. But as I was praying over this, God opened my eyes to something ---- I may love this person, desire a deeper relationship, and long to show my love through my actions; but my ability to be there for this person and to demonstrate my love is inhibited by their lack of desire to allow me into their life. Often God must feel this same way. He loves all people unconditionally, yet so often people don't care to know Him. People don't always claim to outright reject Christ, yet by their actions they push Him away. They don't care to seek after Him, to find truth, and because of this God cannot be there for them in the way that He so desparately desires. In the same way that I'm hurt by this one person, God must be immeasurably hurt by so many. The thought of this broke my heart. People reject Christ because they believe He's judgemental and cruel, but they don't know His love because they've never allowed their hearts to experience that love. What a loving God we serve.... it's heart-breaking that people cannot see this...

Writing Dilemma

I'm writing, yet I have not fully processed what I'm going to write. It may be that I do not know what to write. Yes, that is the case, I do not know what to write. And so I sit..... you may want to know why I want to write when I know not what to write. And regretably I have no answer. And so I continue to sit..... at times I would prefer that my writing skills were more coherent, that my thoughts flowed a bit better, perhaps then I could think of what to write. But no such luck. It seems that I love writing of spiritual things, yet when I write simply to write of my life, my mind chooses to go blank. I could write of work, but work is not eventful at the moment, hence my reason for writing. I could write of Jason, but cannot imagine what to write of him. I could write of leisurely activities. I could write of friends. But again, I cannot think of why to write of these things, let alone what to write of these things. And so I sign off and will write when I have something to write of.

The Future.....

Some days time creeps by so slowly. And other times it flys by so fast. Work usually creeps by. I'm excited for this summer. Jason graduates and our life moves on! This year has been great, don't get me wrong, but I'm excited for new things. We're planning a trip to the Carolina's in the Spring to check out areas we could possibly move to. We want to move! And we fear if we don't just do it right away, we'll never go. It's a sad thought (for us) to be stuck in Minnesota for the rest of our lives. We've had enough of this cold weather and want to be near mountains.

It's hard to know sometimes.....where God wants us. At times it'd be nice to hear a voice from Heaven saying, "Go here" or "Go there." And yet I love the perspective that says, "Go, and if God does not want you where you're going, He'll close the doors." It's my prayer that He does just this.

Where will we work? Who knows? And often my perspective is, does it really matter? Where will we live? Again, who knows.....

All I know is we're not ready to settle down. I can't even imagine the thought of buying a house and paying off the $100,000+ morgage for the majority of my life. And yet renting isn't ideal either. So I suppose we may get a house at some point, An inexpensive house...

You live within your means, you know? I suppose I'm realizing God's made me a fighter. I'm going to fight against materialism. And if I realize or anticipate that something will cause me to drift in a direction other than towards my Savior, I'm going to run from it.

We want to work, but we don't want to become obsessed with our careers. We want a house but we don't want to be tied down to our house to such an extent that we wouldn't be willing to go if God asked. We don't want to starve but we neither do we want to be rich. And yet if God blesses us with wealth it's our prayer that we live the same life, giving any extra money to God and His Kingdom.

I better get back to work. I just needed to ramble for a bit :)