ARIZONA AND COLORADO!!!

Jason and I are ecstatic! We're goin on another trip. Another trip to AZ. Even though no one probably cares, I want to share what our trip will be like. We just finished planning and putting it all together this past weekend so it's fresh on my mind. In 3 weeks, the first week of May, we're heading into Pheonix, AZ. We'll fly into Pheonix on the 1st and my brother, his wife, and our new little neice will meet us at the airport. We'll drive to Flagstaff, AZ (which is where they live) and spend the weekend with them. Since my brother can't afford to take work off, we're renting a car in Flagstaff for the whole week and on Monday we're heading out in our rental car and making the 8 hour drive to Colorado Springs, where we have a hotel booked for 4 days. We're going to explore the mountains! We're going to spend Tuesday at Pikes Peak and either Wed. or Thurs. take the 2 hour drive to Rocky Mountain National Park to explore some more. I loooove the mountains. Something about them overwhelms me with awe for God..... On either Thursday or Friday we're driving back to Flagstaff. We'll spend the weekend with my brother and sis-in-law again and hopefully climb Mt. Humphrey (the tallest Mt. in AZ). Then Sunday we'll fly back to MN. We're excited :)

Jason will then be done with school (except for 1 summer class) and will hopefully get a full-time job, God-willing. Then we'll work work work to pay off our student loans. Prayerfully, within 2 years, we'll be free of debt! Then we'll seriously pray and think about moving.

God is great :) This past Easter we stayed home and didn't go see any family. It was amazing. More than ever I was able to meditate on what Christ did. Friday night was incredible and Jason and I had a candle-lit time of prayer and reading on the crucifixion. Sunday was so joyous and for the first real time I was able to praise Him on Easter Sunday without Easter holiday distractions. It was amazing. Every Easter as I grow closer to Jesus Christ, Easter becomes more and more meaningful. It's easily become my favorite holiday. God is amazing :)

Flower Metaphor

Okay so I HAVE to share this because God showed me something simple this morning- simple but to me an amazing realization. On Valentine's Day (like forever ago) Jason bought me 2 gardenia plants in little pots. When I got them they looked ready to bloom into flowers- they had buds and everything. They're high-maintenance plants (require watering every day, direct sunlight, and they need water to be sprayed on them daily). I've been trying and trying to get the buds to bloom. But they continually fall off. It's been aggravating! Latey I've been closely watching a particular bud because it's gotten larger than any buds before it. Well, this morning I woke up and after certain morning routines I went to water the plants again. I reached to pick up one of the pots and nearly fell over- A gorgeous white flower had bloomed overnight! I know it sounds stupid, but you don't even understand how excited that made me! I kept repeating to myself, "It's beautiful, it's beautiful, it's beautiful...." After realizing how ridiculously happy it made me. God spoke to my heart. "Spring, maybe now you can understand how ecstatic I get when you bloom... when you produce fruit for me." There's a reason God uses the "fruit producing" metaphor in His Gospels, and today God enabled me to understand how perfect and beautiful that metaphor is. He tries and tries to prune me and too often I fail and fail to bloom. I want to produce flowers for my Savior!

Some may think this is cheesy, but I don't think so. God speaks to us, and sometimes in silly ways :)

God PLEASE guide our future....

For the first time, we're having to think about where God actually wants us. For so long Jason was in school and we were simply waiting for him to finish. Now we can actually see the finish line, but once we pass it we're not sure where to venture from there. Where do you want us God? We don't want to be anywhere but where You want us... Can you PLEASE write something on this wall I'm staring at? That'd be nice. Make it obvious to us, and we'll go where You're calling us to go, we'll do what You want us to do.

I have this fear....I have this fear of not living my life to it's fullest for the One who gave His life for me. I have this fear of entering Heaven, knowing I failed to manifest the depth of my love for my Savior and God. Life on earth is my opportunity. It's my chance to show God my adoration of Him through the life that I live. It's my chance to do my part in leading others into His Amazing Kingdom.

What if I fail? What if I die and most of my life I lived for myself? I shudder at that thought. I shudder not because I fear God will strike me down, but at the thought that I never fully gave Him my heart. Fully giving Him my heart means fully giving Him my life- every part of my life. Lord, teach me to give everything to You. As I grow older, PLEASE hold me closer and closer. Allow me to understand more of who You are.

We want to live our lives for Christ. And so we're asking, "Lord, where do You want us?" I see so many believers lose sight of faith as they get older. People get tied up in life, tied up in their jobs, tied up in accumulating possessions, tied up in the "American dream," tied up in their families. Their passion for Christ is lost. Their passion for the lost...is lost. And so Jason and I have this fear....that life and time and money and jobs will fog our vision of eternity, as it has for so many. So, Lord, plan our futures for us. Show us where to go. Show us what to do. And enable us to put our selfish desires aside. We love You.

In the Library.....

Jason and I are at the library right now. I'm sitting next to him and he's plucking away at the computer, distraught over a huge presentation he has due tomorrow. Watching him stress out makes me happy I'm done with school and yet sad that he's frazzled. Soon it'll be over. Soon he'll graduate. And soon we'll have "normal" lives. Maybe.... I've often wondered if we're capable of having "normal" lives and I've wondered even more whether or not we'd ever want a "normal" life.

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It's difficult to focus my thoughts since the longer I sit here the more I notice a headache coming on. These flourescent lights.... who invented them? Is it just me or do they cause anyone else headaches? The computer screen must be full of them and I'm certain the overhanging lights are flourescent bulbs hiding under glass globes.
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I don't have a huge agenda of things to get done while being here at the library but I did want to read some. I brought the book "The Shack" since I've heard it's good. So far I've read a few chapters but had hoped to read a couple more tonight. I also brought the "Morning and Evening" Devotional by Charles H. Spurgeon. His devotionals are encouraging and compel me to live passionately for my God. I do randomly post some of his devotionals- those the Holy Spirit uses to speak to my heart. So if you're ever wondering how Spring became so "smart-sounding," you may not be suprised to find out it's not me. It's Charles Spurgeon. I love how he words things- so straightforward and passionately.

Alright I'm signing off so I can read in the library next to my stressed out husband.

"Sin.....exceeding sinful." Romans 7:13

Beware of light thoughts of sin. At the time of conversion, the conscience is so tender, that we are afraid of the slightest sin, Young converts have a holy timidity, a godly fear lest they should offend God. But alas! Very soon the fine bloom upon these first ripe fruits is removed by the rough handling of the surrounding world: the sensitive plant of young piety turns into a willow in after life, too pliant, too easily yielding. It is sadly true, that even a Christian may grow by degrees so callous, that the sin which once startled him does not alarm him in the least. By degrees men get familiar with sin. The ear in which the canon has been booming will not notice the slight sounds. At first a little sin startles us; but soon we say, "Is it not a little one?" Then there comes another, larger, and then another, until by degrees we begin to regard sin as but a little ill; and then flows an unholy presumption" "We have not fallen into open sin. True, we tripped a little, but we stood upright in the main. We may have uttered one unholy word, but as for the most of our conversation, it has been consistent." So we palliate sin; we throw a cloak over it; we call it by dainty names. Christian, beware how thou thinkest lightly of sin. Take heed lest thou fall little by little. Sin, a little thing? Is it not a poisen? Who knows it deadliness? Sin, a little thing? Do not the little foxes spoil the grapes? Doth not the tiny coral insect build a rock which wrecks a navy? Do not little strokes fell lofty oaks? Will not continual droppings wear away stones? Sin, a little thing? It girded the Redeemer's head with thorns, and pierced His heart! It made Him suffer anguish, bitterness and woe. Could you weigh the least sin in the scales of eternity, you would fly from it as from a serpent, and abhor the least appearance of evil. Look upon all sin as that which crucified the Savior, and you will see it to be "exceeding sinful."

Philidelphia, Pennsylvania

We're in PA right now, at the hotel. We're getting back Saturday or Sunday. FYI to all ya'll, we cancelled our cell phone service so cannot be contacted anymore via our cell phones. When we get back we'll get our new home phone number out to everyone. We also don't have internet anymore but can check it at work and at school. If you call and can't get through, it's because out cell phones no longer work.

It's beautiful here in PA. Much warmer than the Twin Cities. We're heading back up to our room!

I killed a bug this morning...

I killed a bug this morning,
And yesterday I killed two.
These bugs were black flies...
the kind that sit on poo.
I wonder if God gets sad
when I kill His bugs...
And if I should feel bad,
when I choose to smash them.
I admit that it would suck...
it would suck to be born a fly,
the opposition you would face
Would make you want to cry...
I may think twice next time,
before squashing a fly.


Man, I'm a good poem writer.....