The battle of being still...

Why is it so hard to be still? It's way too natural for me to fill my days with stuff. Random stuff. Sure, meaningful stuff. Mundane stuff. Useless stuff. It's way easy for me to go, go, go, GO!  But soooo hard for me to be still... am I alone in this?

God's been laying Psalm 46:10 on me lately, "Be still, and know that I am God..." I'm ready to plaster this verse on my wall as a constant reminder!

BE. STILL. SPRING.  It's okay to stop moving, to direct your mind and thoughts solely to Me, to rest in My presence, to listen to My voice, to invest time in My word... 

I know I need this. I WANT more of Him. But whhhhhyyyy is it such a discipline to be still in His presence?  I'm still searching out the whys... there are many...

Actively doing makes me feel productive; for whatever twisted reason resting and being still doesn't. I don't have a natural joy for reading in general; is this why it's hard for me to sit and commit time to God's word each day?  I'm too focused on the physical; I want to spend time and give attention to what I can see, touch and physically feel- my husband, Lylah Mae, family, friends, hobbies. I'm naturally selfish; it's much easier for me to focus on "me" than to focus on Him.  There's a spiritual battle; Ephesians 6... the enemy (lowercase "e") doesn't want me to grow in Christ, doesn't want me to hear His voice, to be His hands and feet in this world.  I could go on and on...

There are many things in my life waging war with the discipline of being still in His presence... but I'm fighting this battle and I won't give up! 

"Set your minds on things above, not on earthly things..." Colossians 3:2 

"Do not let this Book of the Law depart from your mouth, meditate on it day and night..." Joshua 1:8

"The Lord is good to those whose hope is in Him, to the one who seeks Him; it is good to wait quietly for the salvation of the Lord." Lamentations 3:25-26

The world should journal... and me too.

Sheesh... it's been 5+ months already since Lylah entered our picture.  And more than that since my last blog.  I was never very consistent at this task and adding a baby to the mix makes me that much less. 

Blogging is sorta like journaling to me.  And I used to be a fabulous journaler (not a word, I know).  It was part of my nightly routine until Jason came along (guess he's my distraction).  I do think one day I'll regret dropping the habit.  I imagine myself, old and crinkly, drinking prune juice and reflecting on life's journey. Picking up my old journals to read them with the same excitement I would have if reading a novel (maybe more)...  reading through all the ups and downs of life, the joys, the pains... the times when I was confused by God, the times when I was in complete awe of Him... laughing at my immaturity but reading of how God brought me through the "drama" of life- the big and little things. Totally wrapped up in the story and memories, but then... blank pages... silence, silence, silence.  Nothing was written of my husband (my gift from God)... or of my baby girl (our little miracle), or of our torturous but adventurous house renovation, of our days at Forest Springs... the list goes on and on.  Maybe after reflecting on this today I'll pick up the habit again (wishful thinking? time will tell...)

I think journaling can be a testimony... either to myself or to who knows who. I can read through my journals and be reminded of God's faithfulness through my yuck.  And yes, that's already happened- I love reading through old journals.  And who knows who else will read my writing rants.  Maybe no one... maybe a random stranger... maybe a family member.  But my life is a story.  A short one to be sure, but one that hopefully points towards the goodness of God at every turn.

Yes... I should pick it up again.  And you should pick it up too (yes, this suggestion is coming from a journaling hypocrite).  Blogging is nice but isn't the same.  Something about paper and ink is way better. 

Less than 2 weeks!

Ok sure, I've been opposed to being one of "those moms" who constantly blogs or posts about pregnancy and kids.  Why?  I guess I can't exactly quantify it... could it be because we were "trying" for 3 years and it just wasn't happening and all the mommy blogs and posts irked me?  Quite possibly, yes.  Could it be because until I started feeling her kick my innards like crazy, it wasn't fully a reality?  Quite possibly, yes again.  Could it be because I don't really understand what it means to have a mother and have had a natural distaste of any mother-related topics?  *sigh* Again, sure.

Then I contemplate and realize... I need to get over myself.  It's okay for mom's to blog and post things about their experiences as a mother.  After all, for quite a while it becomes their whole life!  This is a new stage of life I'm entering and I know God will shape me and teach me a whole host of wonderful things through it.  Is that exciting?  Heck yes.  Is it scary?  Oh yeah.  But how cool to invest so fully in another life entrusted to you by God?  What a responsibility of crazy magnitude that parents have!

So we have less than 2 weeks left until my due date...  Labor sounds a tad painful.  For the life of me I can't wrap my brain around how it all works out, but I know God created it to happen so it'll happen- and if it doesn't happen naturally I'll get cut open by doctors and that'll be okay too.  My only strange and perhaps unrealistic fear (although we are in Wisconsin...) is that I'll go into labor at night, we'll hit a foolish dear on the road to Wausau, and Jason will have to deliver our baby on the side of the road (can he do it?).  If he pulled it off, I suppose it would make for a cool story...

In the end, painful or a breeze, it's another life-experience God will teach us things through.   And for that I'm excited.  He's got this whole thing in His hands.  What amazing peace that brings!

Friday and my lack of control of life.

Wow, I have a moment to blog.  I better type fast because this may be short-lived (hopefully).  At the moment I'm sitting at my desk at camp, twiddling my thumbs, overtaken by anxiety because I have SO much to do, but alas my hands are tied.  Why?  Because our lovely software provider (normally lovely), based in Kanukuk, MI, have servers that CRASHED this morning!  Aaaaand this affects everything I do.  I can't answer parents questions, all my voicemails, I can't respond to emails, I can't do cabin assignments, I can't print reports needed for Sunday, shall I go on?  But, if we're looking on the bright side, I have a moment to blog.

I don't even know what to write about... I could blog on and on about parenting because we'll be parents soon. But, no thanks.  I could blog on and on about pregnancy since I'm pregnant, but, again, no thanks.  All I will say is it's NO fun having a cold without being able to take Nyquil.  I'm a fan of Nyquil.  It's perfect for colds when you just can't sleep because you're clogged.  It puts me out, which gives me zzz's- a much needed thing when ill.  But, for a time, I understand I can't partake. 

All I can think of right now is "Please Kanukuk, fix your servers SOON!" 

Kid's Quest campers arrived 2 days ago.  Kids in 2-6th grade.  Of the 144 campers that are here, 107 are brand new campers!  This makes me happy.  They seem to be having a great time.  I thoroughly enjoy listening to them holler their camp cheers before meals.  Summer is here!  Since I've been so busy, I haven't had an opportunity to sit in on a session.  They have 2 each day, complete with puppets, singing and a teaching time.  Tomorrow they leave and on Sunday 240 other campers arrive!  Super exciting, super intense! 

It's way cool to know that so many different kids are here.  Those who believe in Christ and those who have never heard about Him, those who are mad at Him, and those who are curious, hurting, indifferent and passionate.  And they're all hearing the same message of the Gospel of Jesus and they each will respond to Him in some way.  Sometimes we see fruit; most often, seeds are planted that will one day take fruit.  And sadly, we know that seeds are planted that will, in some, never produce fruit.  We can plant and water, but God causes the growth.  Prayer is important! 

Good news, the servers are up and running again.  I have work to do.  It's been fun!

Thursday, 3/27/2014

Man alive, snowing AGAIN!  Can I just get a palm tree please, 80 degree weather, and the ocean?  I can't describe how blissful that sounds right now.  We keep thinking winter's going to pass...but it just lingers ooooooonnnnnnnn...  But, okay, I'll try to be content in the continuing temps and absence of all things green and colorful.

We continue to walk through busy weeks here in Wisconsin.  Jason's at camp right now working in the office and I'm here at home listening to Pandora.  I was working on youth camp stuff earlier, but recently was overcome with an urge to blog.  In a moment, I'll have devotions, which I'm seriously thirsty for right now.  If I get ambitious enough maybe I'll work out later.  Then... onto contemplating supper options.

Sometimes life gets overwhelming, for us so busy with ministry.  You're doing things FOR Christ constantly, but when you fail to nourish yourself in His presence you drain out and though what you're doing still has meaning, you're not as effective or passionate.  That about describes me in this moment, though I hate to admit it.  Devotions with Jason and with other believers is so important, but I desperately NEED solitude in God's Word and prayer. 

I'm so thankful Jesus set that example for me in His Word by going into the wilderness to pray.  Oh what I would give to be able to walk outside and sit by a lake in prayer.  But... for now, my living room will do the trick :)

Heavy heart...

I feel like the older I get, the more sensitive I am to the battle around me... and at times it's too much to take. The darkness in this world is overwhelming. Lies and sin generate that darkness, and though it's disguised as pleasure and tells people what they want to hear, it's path leads to pain and suffering. 

And I sit back, seeing those I love, who are caught up in this merry-go-round that's anything but merry.  I hate satan's lies.  The deceitfulness of sin blinds so many.  And the consequences?  Anger, depression, suicide, hatred, confusion, unforgiveness.  Satan exists to destroy... I long for the day when he'll be bound by chains and cast into the lake of fire. 

My heart breaks for those I love...who are now in chains. But I remember I was once in chains too... if only they could see that freedom comes through surrender... complete surrender. Pride and our culture scream the opposite message and our hearts condemn us as guilty.  Yes, we are broken... but there is a Healer.  We are hopeless, but there is Hope.  We don't deserve love, but there is Love...  Jesus Christ.  Through Him alone I've been cleansed of sin and guilt and can stand before my Father in Heaven as His daughter.  Because of Him and His sacrifice on the cross for me, I have nothing to fear.  By His grace, Living Water flows through me and shows me how to live this life.  And the peace... the peace He gives is everlasting and carries me through the darkest moments. 

Surrender... repentance... humility... words that our culture mocks, but words that lead to Life.  I want the world to see Jesus Christ.  My heart breaks... but my hope remains because God never stops working.

"The Lord is not slow in keeping his promise, as some understand slowness. Instead He is patient with you, not wanting anyone to perish, but everyone to come to repentance."
2 Peter 3:9

What God taught me at Menards...

A couple days ago we decided to return several items to Menards that we bought for rebuilding our home, but never actually used.  It took several treks up and down our stairs to haul birch underlayment, insulation rolls, electrical gadgets, carpet and tile samples, and random other odds and ends.  We loaded up the open trailer that we borrowed from a friend and drove to Menards.  It was a super sunny day!

When we got there we parked the truck and trailer in the parking lot.  Everything was secured in place so we didn't think anything of leaving it in the lot for 10 minutes while we printed receipts at the kiosk.  We were inside for 2 minutes before I ran out to the truck to grab something we needed.  On my way back to the front doors, I noticed a man outside pushing a load of insulation in a flat cart.  I didn't think much of it other than feeling sorry for him that he had to endure such a nasty, itchy job!  We were inside for 5-10 minutes more, then went to the truck to start hauling stuff into Menards.  When we got to the trailer, a huge roll of insulation was gone!  Obviously gone!  It had been there when we arrived, so we knew someone had stolen it.  But in broad daylight?  Not far from the entry to Menards?  With 2 Menards employees standing in the cart shed?  Really? 

We both started fuming inside.  WHO would do this?  Who's morals are so jacked that they would do this- they clearly had to have been watching us and jumped out at the most opportune time to take a roll.  Were they hoping we wouldn't notice?  Why one?  Why not all 5 rolls?  I guess that would have been TOO obvious.  Was it the man we had noticed hauling a load of insulation?

Our eyes scanned the parking lot in suspicion and anger.  Everyone was suspect. The dominating thought in my head was "Trust no one!"  Jason was angry and could have attacked any man he saw carrying a roll of insulation!  Thank God no one was...

He went inside to ask if Menards had any cameras in their parking lot while I guarded the rest of our stuff.  Yeah... me and all my ninja moves.  As I was sitting there, I was still fuming inside and I begin to question why I was so mad.   After all, it was just 1 roll of insulation, worth about $15.  I know people steal... all the time.  This doesn't make it right, but why was I reacting as if someone had taken my right arm?  I know people steal, but I suppose it's more painful and unavoidable when it's personal...  I began thinking a lot about the grace of God.  HOW can He be so full of grace when people offend Him constantly.  Stealing is SO contrast to His nature.  I always knew it was, but somehow, on that day, it was more clear to me.  Sin is SO in contrast with His nature, and how can He look past it?  He CAN'T look past it outside of Jesus Christ covering people through His death on the cross!  It was very clear to me that day that there ARE enemies of God everywhere.  We all are enemies of God if we haven't put our faith in Christ.  We have NO right to stand before God alone.  No right and no hope.  I was amazed as I was sitting there at God's grace in light of His justice... and so thankful that I've been forgiven through His Son!  Yet... I was still angry at the thief...

I've been thinking a lot lately about Colossians 3, which says to "set your mind on things above."  Since I was fuming, I figured maybe it was wise to apply that, so I started thinking about what God's Word says to our situation on how we should respond, and this verse came to mind...

"If someone slaps you on one cheek, turn to them the other also. If someone takes your coat, do not withhold your shirt from them." Luke 6:29

WHAT?!  Had I seen the dude, I should have handed him another roll of insulation??  Really God?  And He gently answered "yes" as I kept thinking about other passages like Matthew 5:44, "I say unto you, love your enemies, bless them that curse you, do good to them that hate you, and pray for them which despitefully use you, and persecute you." 

Wow, how God's will is so different from our nature!!  Though I love God, have committed my heart and soul to Him, and strive to serve Him, I still in that moment wanted to take out the thief who stole our roll!  But as I repeated these verses to myself, I began to calm down.  Yes, he does want me to love whoever stole from us... why?  Why should I love him?  Because God loves him and wishes that none perish. "He is patient, not wanting anyone to perish, but everyone to come to repentance" 2 Peter 3:9.

God's grace is amazing.  ESPECIALLY in light of his holiness.  Because of that incident at Menards, I worship Him even more.  I'm even more awed at this God I serve... So in some odd way I thank the man who stole $15 from us.  "You intended to harm me, but God intended it for good to accomplish what is now being done, the saving of many lives" Genesis 50:20.  I don't think many lives are being saved by this experience, but in my own heart God has worked it for good and I adore HIM!

I'm intrigued...

I recently began reading a book called "Behind Enemy Lines."  I'm not typically a reader of historical books simply because I don't make the time, but I've really enjoyed it.  It's made up of a collection of letters sent home from soldiers in various wars throughout American history.  It's very enlightening to hear their experiences first-hand and their thought processes in light of the horror they witnessed and the loneliness they felt.  It's given me a newfound appreciation for history because it makes it come to life.  I remember more quickly that they were normal people with normal thoughts and struggles.  Too often I look at history as "old stories," rather than embracing the reality of what those individuals faced and battled. 

Oh today...

Woke up this morning... first day in several that it was cool with a sweet breeze blowing through our curtains.  Mmm... a day with little stickiness and humidity.  As typical, cereal made a great breakfast- Grape Nut Flakes, that is.  Reading the Bible in quiet on our couch is something that's precious and doesn't happen often on work days.  A walk to the Post Office to mail "lost" shoes to my nieces was a nice check off my list.  A trek to True Value scored a nice deal on Ortho bug (ant) killer.  $18.99 with a $9 mail-in rebate + a $5 off coupon = 1.5 gallons for 4 bucks...!  A long conversation with a good friend back home was special and lunch was string cheese, cherries, a NutriGrain bar and fruit snacks.  I made a promise to Jason I'd get our entry grouted this week.  So what do I do?  Wait till the last day of the week to start it, of course!  But accomplish that task I did, while listening to Taylor Swift on Pandora (yes, I like her music).  And now?  Jason's home and we relax together and get ready to take a walk.  Brats make for a nice, easy menu tonight. 

Good day home...

Mondays...

On Mondays I recently started hanging out with Junior High girls from our youth group.  After school, they walk on over to our place (one of the benefits of being within a few blocks of the middle and high school!).

Typically, there are about 8 girls that come, full of giggles and energy after sitting at a desk all day.  I wasn't sure what to expect going into this... I knew I'd received nudgings from the Holy Spirit to do this.  It was a step of obedience.  God's Wod has been "sharper than a two-edged sword" in my life.  When I rebelled against Him and preferred to do my own thing to satisfy my own pleasures and lusts, I was aware of what His Word said.  Often times, I ignored it and still do, but it never fails to pierce and shape my mind and heart.  It's imperative to be in God's Word, as His children.  He reveals Himself to us through it.  And Satan, our accuser, throws lies at us constantly- we have to be equipped with the "sword" He's given us. 

I want these girls to be equipped.  I want their lives to be "built on the rock," rather than on sand.  I know that pain, pride, sin, lies, and trials will test their faith, and they will have a choice- a choice to walk the narrow, difficult path of obedience and faith; or to do what's right in their own eyes.  And I pray they choose faith and obedience... there's so much reward in it.

And so on Mondays they come... and they guzzle lemonade like they've been in the dessert for weeks.  And I limit the cookies they devour so they'll still have room for supper.  And we laugh, we memorize Scripture together, we play Bible games, share stories, read the Bible together, they ask questions, and we pray.  I hope it's strengthening them in their faith and that God's using me to bless them.

They've been a huge blessing to me.  I think as adults we can be so guarded.  We guard our tongues and our actions; we can lose our sense of humor and our transparency.  We think we have to have it all together.  We don't open ourselves up to others and don't "expect the best of each other" (1 Corinthains 13:7).  It's refreshing to hear their honesty... to witness their trust.  To listen to their laughter over things I've forgotten to laugh about. 

But my heart is reminded of the struggles they face at school.  It brings back memories of my middle school days- the days I'd rather forget- days filled with bullies, the obsession over clothes, peer pressure, popularity, egos, the list goes on... They deal with tough things that could potentially eat them alive.

As adults, are we coming alongside them?  Are we discipling our youth?  Are we letting them ask questions and willing to give them honest answers?  Are we challenging them with God's Word and showing them Christ's love?  This isn't a job just for youth pastors or camp staff... it's a priviledge and opportunity we have as followers of Christ.

Febrauary 16, 2013

Yikes... neglect is what my blog has experienced.  I've neglected it for lack of time.  Today I only write because I'm at Camp and our registration software is down- giving me no task to complete.  And for a moment I've remembered, "Ahhh... yes, I have a blog." 

In 5 minutes I'll get up from my chair and head to consume lunch in Camp's cafteria.  After scarfing down my food, I'll head to clothe myself in winter warmth.  I'll trek to the ski shop and put on my board.  I'll rent snowboards until a beginner walks in- or in many cases, several beginners.  Together, we will head to the hill where I'll do my best to teach them how to relax with 2 feet on one board.  It will take time.  It always does.  They'll fall again and again.  But if they have determination, they will listen to my voice and practice doing the very things their brain opposes.  And they'll learn to board.  They will have fun and shoot for bigger hills and faster speeds. 

I have 4 hours with them.  How can I share my life with them?  How can I encourage them to live life with determination.  In the same way they'll struggle to learn snowboarding, if they've given their lives to Christ, they will struggle to live their lives for him.  Their hearts and mind will tell them false things about Him and they'll be prone to doubting who He is.  They'll battle this.  But if they listen to His Word and practice doing the very things their flesh opposes, they will learn the purity of faith and perserverance.  They'll have eternal joy and shoot for "bigger hills and faster speeds."

Life... YOUR CRAZY!

Lord, help me to use my time wisely.  When I'm swamped, teach me not to put my time with YOU on the back burner.  Teach me to prioritize it over all else.  My heart wants this and knows I desparately need this, but my brain pressures me to fulfill various obligations and responsibilities -even those that I place on myself.

I want to be faithful in prayer.  Teach me to make this more of a daily discipline. 

I love you!

Awed by Jesus...

"My happiness is found in less
Of me and more of You.
I have found the answer is
To love You and be loved by You alone.

You crucify me and the world to me
And I will only boast in You.

I'm so satisfied
At the thought of You
Growing up in me,
Covering everything"


There is nothing more worth living for than Jesus Christ.  Without Him my soul would be black and my future depressing and dark.  Without His grace... His love...without His righteousness and purity... I would be entirely lost.  Hopeless and helpless. 

He gave me joy and it continues pouring.  He solidifies within my heart His truth.  He calms my doubts and quiets my fears.  Anything and everything pure inside of me is on account of Him. And nothing more.   

He protects me from the one who's tried and continues in vain to destroy me.  When I wander, He calls me back.  When I fall into sins, He convicts me and delivers me from their grip.

I love Him.  I worship Him.  He is my God.

5/1/2012 - What a day!!

Yesterday was quite the experience.  We heard weather updates (hypothetical thoughts) on the weather channel about storms that were coming in.  Yikers!  I say yikes because Jason and Brent recently tore down our house entry, put it up on blocks, completed laying and supporting the floor and for the past week it's been sitting like that exposed!  No walls- no roof.  Why?  With so much going on at camp, there just isn't a lot of time to pour into it.  Tarps were our only protection in keeping the rain out and, let me tell you, they didn't accomplish their job so well.  Soo... Monday night Brent came to help Jason "finish" the entry.  Their lofty goal was to have it entirely completed- roof and all- by Monday evening.  Not so!  However, they did get all the walls up and doors framed and did a great job.  Yesterday we had to (and by we, I mean Jason and I) completely build the roof- framing, ice guard, & tar paper. 

Jason was stressed- probably more stressed that I was his help!  It was difficult leveling everything out, but by 4pm FINALLY, we were ready to lay the sheeting on the roof.  We wondered, "How in the universe will the two of us do this?"  It would require one of us to sit on the roof tress, while the other lifted the large sheet of plywood over their head and up to the other person.  Yikes!  Before starting, we realized we were missing some metal roofing hangers and had to make a run to C & D (1 minute away).

God timing is PERFECT because right away, when we got back, a friend (a tall, strong guy named Todd), showed up unexpectedly to help!  And 5 minutes after that another friend, Brent, showed up to help too!  Wow...  We hadn't asked either of them to help and completely believe this was God's provision.  The timing was dead on.  He KNEW we needed them!  Within an hour and a 1/2, we had the sheeting up. 

Stapling and nailing the ice guard and tar paper down didn't take too long.  I can say with 100% certainty that I'm learning far more about construction than I ever imagined I would.  I can also say... it's fun! 

Last night we got hit by a storm hard.  We were nervous this morning as we drove to the house to check on it.  Would the entry still be standing?  Would the tar paper be torn off?  Would our work hold up?  And if it didn't hold up in the storm, what on earth did we do wrong? (as far as we knew we took EVERY precaution and step necessary- talked to construction guys, read construction books, had knowledgeable men working on it with us).

To our relief, it was perfectly intact- you couldn't even tell a storm had hit!  No leaks.  Nothing.  I suppose this is the purpose of a roof, but I guess when you build it yourself there's always the question...

4/25/2012

Oh Heavenly Father, Your command seems so astronomical, "Go and make disciples of all the nations."  Sometimes I feel like I'm trying but is it amounting to much?  Other times I fear I'm not trying enough.  I've known so many who have happily proclaimed a faith in You, but a few years down the road they've turned away completely.  I know others who proclaim Your name but their lives reflect the world more than Your Word.  My sphere of influence seems so minimal.  And my sinful nature and flesh lacks what it takes to be all that I desire for You.  It breaks my heart to see so many hurting youth.  And to see them chasing down worldly pleasures above Your heart.  It angers me to see satan's hold on their lives and the deception they've bought into.  You've asked me to pray, and I won't stop.  But I need Your strength and patience.  I think back to my younger years and of how patient You were with me.  I failed again and again and again, convinced You were angry at me for my sin.  Convinced I couldn't "make the cut."  But You were patient and throughout the years and every circumstance You pursued me until You revealed Your love to me in 2003 and opened wide my eyes to Your blood shed on the cross for my wickedness.  I found freedom in You for the first time.  You were so patient with me though I didn't deserve it.  And in the same way you're patient with everyone.  Keep transforming hearts, Father, and give me the wisdom to see that even when things aren't on my time frame, You're drawing people to Yourself.  Help me to be faithful in prayer and in what I can do for You.  I love You.

3/21/2012- Progress!

Progress is being made on the house.  Yesterday the guys came out to raise our roof a foot (it was 7 ft.).  What a process!!  They continue working today.  We're praying and trusting God protects them.  This job has been done before but it's unusual.  Some may call us crazy, but we don't think so.  God provided this house through much prayer and very inexpensively.  We are putting some $ into "re-doing" it, but what we're contributing is so minimal to what we could've paid buying a "move-in ready" home  and quite truthfully, there aren't any homes in this area (in our price range) that are "move-in ready."  The labor is mostly being done by us.  We so desire to be good stewards of all God has provided. 

In today's culture people are accustomed to purchasing a "move-in" ready home and taking out a loan for it.  Many years ago, it was more common for families to build their own home.  That's just how it was done.  Neither avenue is wrong.  We're just taking the "old" route I guess. 

Time tends to be a major factor people don't build or remodel much.  We freely admit our time has been crunched lately.  Daytimes are spent at Camp involved in ministry there.  Evenings off are spent working on the house.  Day's off are spent working on the house.  But without kids yet, it's a feasible task.  And one that Jason's enjoying.  He's also enjoying the "man-time" with others who have so graciously sacrificed their time. 

I will post more pictures soon.  It'll be interesting to hear your reactions :) 

Once we're moved out in 2 weeks, the stress will majorly lighten.

3/19/2012

Oh wow, my blog is getting away from me.  Really, TIME is getting away from me.  It's not easy for me to remember to update this thing.  A lot has happened since the last post.  I typed it in the middle of my dad's crisis.  God is so faithful and good.  His plan is perfect.  The day my dad had to leave his house, he got a full time job!!  And it's such a great job for him.  We made it over that bump in the road.  Onto the next!

Since then we've been so busy here at Camp, we bought a house (God's provision), we're revamping it, and needing to move out of our current rental home in a couple weeks.  Whew!  A lot to take in.  Each morning I wake up, "Okay, craziness again.  Prep yourself Spring!"  Next week all the staff here are headed to Camp's staff retreat at Fort Wilderness.  This will be 3+ REFRESHING days of fellowship and meetings surrounding the ministry here.  I'm so looking forward to it.   Then Jason's parents are coming to visit the week before we have to be out of our current rental home on April 6th.  I hope they're ready to jump on the craziness wagon with us!  We'll appreciate their help with the house and packing.

Today my agenda is... enter camper registrations & get caught up here in the office, then grab some boxes and get a-packin!  Maybe I'll walk over to the new house to help Jason sometime after 5pm.  Packing is never a fun job.  It's especially a downer when you're trying to shift through your stuff and someone elses.  The job becomes more time consuming and feels less productive no matter how much you accomplish.  Jason's job is the new house, mine is to pack the old :)

Something I'm thankful for today?  My health.  Our health!  Each day I wake up and I'm able to breathe and live comfortably.  I don't take this for granted.  Any day it could be taken away- I have zero control over my health.  But how can I use what I've been given for God's glory?  This is the question I will continually ask myself.  This is the question I ask myself today.

1/20/2012

I can't think straight.  I have to control myself to steady the whirlwind of nagging thoughts streaming through my head.  I wish I could let them go, but it takes all the concentration in the world to replace them with anything else.  These moments of hardships though, while incredibly distressing, have a sweetness to them that's hard to explain.  It's in moments like these that I cling most tightly to Jesus and so clearly feel Him holding me with a grip I'm convinced will never loosen.   

Have you not known?
Have you not heard?
The everlasting God, the LORD,
The Creator of the ends of the earth,
Neither faints nor is weary.
His understanding is unsearchable.
He gives power to the weak,
And to those who have no might He increases strength.
Even the youths shall faint and be weary,
And the young men shall utterly fall,
But those who wait on the LORD
Shall renew their strength;
They shall mount up with wings like eagles,
They shall run and not be weary,
They shall walk and not faint.
Isaiah 40: 28-32

Thank you Lord, for how You carry your children.  Thanks for how you love so deeply and assure us of your faithfulness in moments when we need nothing more.   Help me to dwell on You and not on the earthly fears of what could transpire.  I need You... I always need You.

Love, Your daughter

Wow...

I can't believe how time flies.  Or at how terrible I am at anything online.  Not having internet at home can be frustrating, yet a valuable thing because it hinders me from sitting hours on end in from of a computer screen!  Problem is, I rarely update anything. 

Needless to say, it's been some time since I've updated this blog.  And quite frankly, I just plain haven't had time!  December has been so busy here at camp.  And now, implementing the new registration software for the summer has me in the office more than normal for this time of year.  LOVE it though- it's super neat seeing how lives are changed and impacted through what God is doing here. 

It's 5:13pm and I'm in my cube at camp, waiting for Jason to finish up for the day.  Then we'll head home, get supper together, and head out to Spirit, WI to spend the evening with his uncle and cousins and his uncle's parents. 

Can you believe the weather?!  It's been outrageous!  Complete flip from last year!  I love the temps, but do wish we had more snow.  Having snow out at Camp in the winter plays a MAJOR part in our ministry here.  We do have snow, but it's scarce.  We are so thankful for the snow-making machines that were donated to camp a few years ago!  What would we have done this year without them!?

Well, I'll update more later.  When Jason's hungry, he's... well, hungry!  Gotta head home.  Blessings and here's a favorite passage...

"Who is wise and understanding among you? Let them show it by their good life, by deeds done in the humility that comes from wisdom. But if you harbor bitter envy and selfish ambition in your hearts, do not boast about it or deny the truth. Such “wisdom” does not come down from heaven but is earthly, unspiritual, demonic. For where you have envy and selfish ambition, there you find disorder and every evil practice. But the wisdom that comes from heaven is first of all pure; then peace-loving, considerate, submissive, full of mercy and good fruit, impartial and sincere. Peacemakers who sow in peace reap a harvest of righteousness."

James 3: 13-18

Busy.

Busy days, busy days....  Good, but busy days.  Life this past week has been a whirlwind.  So many things to do.  It seems that days are never long enough to fit everything in.  Before I blink, the day is gone.  I've been contemplating getting a weekly planner lately.  I've never had one and never felt compelled to want one until recently.  Now it seems I need one! I want each day to be as productive as possible.  And I'm not so sure that "winging it" from day to day has been the best direction.  I don't feel like I forget to do things... though maybe I forget all that I could be doing that would be more meaningful. 

Life is short.  The older I get, the shorter it seems.  Why is that?  Any answers anyone?  It makes me remember how precious time is and how fleeting my little life is.  I'm reminded that there is so much more than this life, this place... 

How do I make the most of the time God gives me?  Lord, keep teaching me...